Babylon Bee: Eric’s New 700-Page Biography

June 21, 2018

This article was originally published in the Babylon Bee, to read the article on their website, click here.

Eric has hit the big time! The Babylon Bee!

Eric Metaxas Announces 700-Page, In-Depth Biography Of Bob The Tomato

June 21, 2018

NEW YORK CITY, NY—Author and radio personality Eric Metaxas recently announced his next book, a biography on one of the most pivotal theologians in the annals of Christian produce. The book, titled Bob: Evangelist, Prophet, Teacher, Tomato, will be the authoritative biography of Bob the Tomato, the venerated vegetable who planted countless seeds of wisdom and blossomed a generation of young believers.

Bob, along with Larry the Cucumber, is considered by many to be the father of evangelical cartoon vegetables.

“A biography is such an enormous undertaking to produce,” Metaxas said. “There is a cornucopia of ripe history with a figure like Bob. It’s so hard to decide what fertile stories to pick from such a fruitful life,” Metaxas said. “Bob the Tomato’s exemplary life stands out among other faith-based fruit so much, to compare them would almost be like comparing apples and oranges.” After he had run out of puns, Metaxas went on to talk about the cool mugs you can order from his radio show for several hours.

Metaxas says he was inspired to pen the exhaustive tome by his own morning devotionals, which consist of watching two to three episodes of VeggieTales in the House before praying for divine guidance. “When Bob sings a song, my heart sings along,” said Metaxas. “Kids these days barely even know who Bob the Tomato really was. He was more than just some pre-ketchup, squash-and-stretch joke for kids to laugh at while being cleverly tricked into hearing about Jesus. This guy was the cream of the crop.”

Bob: Evangelist, Prophet, Teacher, Tomato will also feature a foreword by Phil Vischer titled, “I KNOW A TOMATO IS A FRUIT! STOP EMAILING ME!” The hardcover edition is set to hit bookstore shelves in August of 2018 and will weigh 37 pounds.